If you’re a criminal alien with “family relationships” in the U.S., are studying on the American taxpayer’s dime, are the recipient of the “attention of [pro-amnesty] advocacy groups,” and have “been here a long time”; if you are the focus of “political considerations,” were in the midst of applying for legal status when, oops, you stumbled into crime, have made a career of traffic offenses or have violated state law the Obama administration does not want enforced (identity theft and fraud are examples); if charges are pending against you, but you have yet to be convicted—KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK.

You’re more than qualified for leniency, or for what the Obama administration has termed “prosecutorial discretion.” Deportation is no threat to you. Congratulations! You’re on schedule for joining what the American Founding Fathers had hoped would be a commonwealth of virtue.

As for the youthful criminal alien who still has that certain, impish je ne sais quoi—why, he’ll qualify right away for this administration’s “Deferred Action for Childhood Arrivals” program. DACA is not quite the proposed DREAM Act, but it’ll get the offender all the benefits he can dream of—education, food stamps, health care, a shot at a job—and a reprieve from deportation.

According to the Center for Immigration Studies, the Obama administration’s “prosecutorial discretion criteria are allowing factors such as family relationships, political considerations, or attention from advocacy groups to trump criminal convictions as factors leading to deportation.”

In 2013, ICE (U.S. Immigration and Customs Enforcement) released 68,000 criminal aliens back into the community. Much of their offenses were of the drunken-driving variety—among them were no homeschoolers on the lam from Germany, thank God! But, as FoxNews.com reported, the skill-sets in this sample of criminal aliens did include murder and rape.

For a second, I thought of encouraging my only sister, stuck in South Africa as she is, to live on the edge and consider becoming an illegal alien in the USA. It’s the easiest path to de facto permanent residency. No need for an education. No need for proficiency in the English language. “Press two for Spanish” is all the conversational eloquence required.

Public charges are preferred. Ditto a vice or two. But who am I kidding? Little sister lacks what it takes. She’s not made of the right stuff. With an ethic of work and self-reliance, she’d be the bane of this country. Besides, white immigrants like us have no “advocacy groups” and aren’t subject to “political considerations,” when faced with deportation. Still, I’d like Soledad O’Brien, of the “Black, Brown and Plain Boring in America” CNN series, to know this: Although we lack pigment appeal—white immigrants weep for their far-away families just as brown people do. Except that we cry behind closed doors.

Yes, perks are for perps with the right pigmentation.

So clear a point is this that in the last amnesty bill, introduced in 2013 by the Senate, “illegal alien” is a thing of the past. The “Border Security, Economic Opportunity, and Immigration Modernization Act” (S.744) achieves legal leveling not by defending our country’s borders, but through the near abolition of the illegal versus legal distinction. In S.744, these new, privileged wards of the state are known as “Registered Provisional Immigrants.” RPIs will enjoy protections unavailable to nationals, or to immigrants who’re in the U.S. on merit.

In marked contrast to an RPI, there is not much you, me and Chancellor Merkel can do if Gen. Keith Alexander’s National Security Agency and apparatus sics its spies on us. The same goes for our rights under the successors of Lois Lerner and Sarah Hall Ingram, at the Internal Revenue Service’s tax-exempt division.

But woe betide the NSA or IRS agent who does unto a registered provisional Democrat what he did to a tea-party patriot. The “Border Security, Economic Opportunity, and Immigration Modernization Act” promises to name and shame this wicked government worker.

Caught in the improper use of the personal data of an RPD (Registered Provisional Democrat), the agent will incur a criminal penalty. The Bill specifies that snooping on beneficiaries of S.744 will be permitted only for the purpose of determining benefits—benefits that happen to be carved out of the hide of taxpaying Americans, immigrants included, who’re bereft of equal protections.

To prevent any “errant” law-enforcement officer from daring to quiz a suspicious illegal alien about his status, a “document of special protection while waiting” will be issued to these Democrats-in-Waiting.

Oh, for the privileges of a “Registered Provisional Immigrant,” or a criminal alien, for that matter.

This must be a slow news week; we’re discussing CNN and its plummeting Nielsen ratings.

In a calculated attempt “to capture [its] lost glory,” Rush Limbaugh has anticipated that the Cable News Network would “move further to the left.”

Question: How will we tell that CNN has made that move?

The Obama Heads at CNN are true believers. Although not as shrill as the MSNBC desperados, CNN’s John King, Jessica Yellin, Dona Lemon, Anderson Cooper, Soledad O’Brien, Piers Morgan—all are shifting into campaign mode, as the November election nears.

Especially intense are the pitches coming from likes of O’Brien (she is the Agony Aunt of the “Black In America,” “Latino In the Same Place,” and plain “Boring in America” propaganda series), Yellin (a yelling for her man), Gloria Borges, Suzanne Malveaux, and other women.

It’s impossible to miss the sexual overtones. A gleaming flash of dentition, a glowing complexion: when the women folk report on Big Daddy O, their fondness is on display for all CNN’s 291,000 national viewers to see.

O’Brien, by the way, was filmed fist-bumping Roland Martin, another race-issues agitator at CNN. In the CNN hood, a fist bump is the way you congratulate a comrade on a job well done for Obama.

Under the O’Brien belt is another big production, “Boiling Point: Inside the Tea Party.” In this amateurish effort, a poorly written script and a scary sound track were deployed to convey a never-subliminal message: When it comes to the tea party, CNN’s dwindling viewers should run for their lives.

However, the rajah of right-wing radio gives CNN too little credit. The planners at CNN are craftier than Rush thinks.

What do I mean?

The GOP message is not worth much. But for what it’s worth, the political nerve center at CNN is working to shape that message. It does so by presenting to the public Republican commentators who are left-liberals in all but name.

CNN is cleverly crafting the meta-message.

Take Ana Navarro, nascent Republican star on CNN. The verbose Navarro is a Republican identity-politics activist, who would have liked Obama to deliver on his original immigration-policy promises. Navarro had been in the employ of Sen. John McCain, known for surrounding himself with, and siring, vapid women.

Yet another liberal Republican who’s been entrusted by CNN with moving the GOP “forward” is John Avlon, former chief speechwriter for one-time New York mayor Rudolph Giuliani. On Independence Day, this wolf in bipartisan clothing framed the act of reaching across the aisle in compromise as a supreme act of independence, in the mold of the Founding Fathers. (The reverse is true. Bipartisanship is a euphemism for relinquishing principle for political pragmatism. To paraphrase one hardcore tea partier, the only time you want your representative to reach across the aisle is to grab a Democrat or an errant Republican by the throat.)

Certainly in the incessant babbling of Erin Burnett, host of “Outfront,” it is hard to discern a point of view. But late in June, Burnett let slip, inadvertently, that she too holds out hope for socialism. Burnett was hosting “a valued member of the ‘Outfront’ Strike Team,” whatever gimmick that stands for. The “striker” was Bill Gross, co-chief investment officer of PIMCO. Gross positively spun the political platform of Francois Hollande by describing France’s manifestly socialist agenda as “pro-growth,” and as “a different way forward.”

Together, Burnett and Gross entertained the possibility that President Francois Hollande’s Socialist Party might just “save Europe’s economy and ours.” I listened to the Gross man live on TV. Gross made a salutary reference to France’s founding principles of “liberté, égalité, fraternité.” CNN’s transcriber failed to transcribe the reference, writing in its place: “(INAUDIBLE)”.

But here is Mr. Gross(out)’s verbatim nod to the blood-drenched, illiberal French Revolution and its legacy:

“I think what [Hollande] is trying to do is favor labor as opposed to capital. Remember ‘liberté, égalité, fraternité‘, and you know he’s moving in that direction. To the extent that he moves only gradually, I think that’s a positive. What France needs, what Euro land needs is growth. And to the extent that they can prevent a continuing recession, then the growth is going to be positive.”

Erin’s strike man was conflating France’s vote against austerity with a “pro-growth” agenda!

The Law is a pamphlet published, in 1850, by Frenchman Frédéric Bastiat. A classical liberal “economist, statesman, and author,” Bastiat castigated his countrymen for becoming “the most governed, the most regulated, the most imposed upon, the most harnessed, and the most exploited people in Europe.”

Bastiat saw France as a society that “receives its momentum from power”; a passive people who “consider themselves incapable of bettering their prosperity and happiness by their own intelligence and their own energy.”

The brilliant Bastiat did not share Mr. Gross’s fondness for French “fraternity.” “Enforced Fraternity Destroys Liberty,” he proclaimed. “In fact, it is impossible for me,” wrote Bastiat, “to separate the word fraternity from the word voluntary. I cannot possibly understand how fraternity can be legally enforced without liberty being legally destroyed, and thus justice being legally trampled underfoot.”

“So long as they expect everything from the law, their relationship to the state [will be] the same as that of the sheep to the shepherd.”

This mindset leapfrogged across The Pond and took hold in America, where agents like CNN help it spread.